Being a Christian is a fight and sometimes I let myself win, and I have to confess for the last few months I have let myself rule my life. I have been miserable. It all started with the move to Florida. I knew we were being called there, but I did not want to go. I can remember walking down the hill from our old church to our apartment praying over and over again, "Lord, I don't want to go to Florida, I don't want to go to Florida, I don't want to go to Florida!" Childish I know, but that was were I was. After that I was angery and pouting that the Lord would send me here. I stopped praying, seeking the Lord, and was becoming bitter. My poor husband, he gets the brunt of my wrath!
But then, by God' grace, during church this sunday I was convicted by the holy spirit. Hey, news flash, It is not about me! The universe does not revolve around me. Woo-is-me is going to get me know where. Man, was I knocked on my knees. Not about me. It is so easy to stop fighting, to stop running the race and let "me" rule my life.
So I am back, and I am pushing forward! I got my armour on and I am ready to go!
22 September 2006
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2 comments:
I hear that Sara. It is so easy to get so caught up in what WE want. I have been feeling really selfish and down about the Kentucky move.
I know we made this decision together, that we think it is best for our family right now, and what God wants for us, but still. I am stubborn.
I am so glad God has snapped you out of it, I hope I can stay focused on him as well through the next few months.
Praying for you guys.
Hey, Sara...this puts things into a little bit of perspective for me. I was put off that I found out about your move via an all-church email; now I read this post and I imagine that you just didn't want to talk about it. I thought it hit ME like a ton of bricks--and YOU were the one who had to leave all of us behind! Talk about "it's not about ME"--I have to apologize to you that I just pulled back into my hurt little cocoon and didn't even consider how hard it was for you to pull up roots yet again. Please forgive me, my dear friend.
I miss your p-mails; I'll send one to YOU soon. :)
Blessings on you, and may God continue to prove Himself faithful.
Love, Liz
PS Happy Anniversary! Yeah, what a wild ride!
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